Self-Compassion

Real Self-Compassion can be difficult. Especially if you we raised in a not-so-compassionate environment. Sometimes it can be a real challenge to keep the voice in your head from echoing criticism, dismissal, or sarcasm you might have heard in the past.

Let's make sure that voice in your head is a kind one.

Skills

For Difficult Times

Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth.

Acknowledge the difficulty you are facing and gently place a hand over your heart. Feel the warmth and the gentle pressure.

Say to yourself, "This is a moment of suffering. Suffering is a part of life. I can give myself the compassion I need."

Take a few more deep breaths, allowing these words to resonate. Imagine a warm, comforting light surrounding you, offering you kindness and understanding.

For Mistakes

Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth.

Acknowledge the mistake you made, recognizing that everyone makes mistakes. Place a hand over your heart and feel the warmth and gentle pressure.

Say to yourself, "I made a mistake, and that's okay. I am human, and humans are imperfect. I am allowed forgive myself and learn from this experience."

Take a few more deep breaths, allowing these words to resonate. Imagine a sense of release and acceptance flowing through you.

For Self-Doubt

Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth.

Acknowledge the feelings of self-doubt you are experiencing. Place a hand over your heart and feel the warmth and gentle pressure.

Say to yourself, "It's natural to have self-doubt. I am doing the best I can. I can trust in my abilities and give myself the kindness I need."

Take a few more deep breaths, allowing these words to resonate. Imagine a sense of confidence and support surrounding you, uplifting your spirits.

For Being Critical

Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth.

Acknowledge the critical thoughts you are having about yourself. Place a hand over your heart and feel the warmth and gentle pressure.

Say to yourself, "I recognize that I am being critical of myself. It's okay to feel this way. I am human, and humans have flaws. I can be kind to myself in this moment."

Remind yourself, "I am worthy of compassion, just as I am. It's okay to struggle with being human. I can learn and grow without harsh self-criticism."

Continue to breathe deeply, feeling the warmth of your hand over your heart, and let go of the critical thoughts. Replace them with a sense of more realistic thoughts and kindness.

When you are ready, gently open your eyes and carry this feeling of self-compassion with you, reminding yourself that you deserve the same kindness and understanding you would offer to a friend.

The Absolute Expert

For more ideas, recordings, and self-compassion activities, visit Dr. Kristin Neff's website.